The Clock Ticks

• 
  Harper’s Crisis of Accountabilty Grows
  Source: Liberal Website
  February 17, 2006
  
  
  
  As the second week of Stephen Harper’s new government draws to a close, the Conservatives’ crisis of accountability has spiralled further out of control.
  
  The latest example of the Prime Minister’s accountability flip-flop is the appointment of former Conservative MP and campaign co-chair John Reynolds to the Privy Council. The title of privy councillor is normally held by cabinet ministers and parliamentary secretaries who advise the Governor General on classified government business.
  
  Mr. Reynolds now works as a “senior strategic advisor” to one of Canada’s top law firms. As a Privy councillor, this backroom insider will have access to classified cabinet documents, even though he is paid to give CEOs advice on how to lobby the federal government.
  
  Mr. Harper’s Accountability Act was the cornerstone of his election campaign. One of it key elements is to “crack down on the revolving door between ministers’ offices, the senior public service and the lobbying industry”. By appointing a lobbyist and close friend to the Privy Council, Prime Minister Harper has clearly violated his own Accountability Act.The ethics watchdog group Democracy Watch –which endorsed the Conservative accountability package during the election campaign- has now lashed out at Prime Minister Harper.
  
  Duff Conacher, co-ordinator of Democracy Watch, recently told the media: “Stephen Harper proved with some cabinet appointments that he is a hypocrite and, by failing to keep the pledge to close the loopholes in the ethics code, he showed that he is a liar.”
  
  Ethics watchdog groups and the Canadian people have good reason to be concerned about Mr. Harper’s increasingly unaccountable behaviour. After two weeks as Prime Minister, Stephen Harper has:
  
  - Appointed his unelected Quebec campaign co-chair Michael Fortier to the Senate and the Cabinet as Minister of Public Works, after campaigning for an elected senate;
  Overseen the appointment of Fred Loiselle, who was involved in an electoral fraud scandal in Quebec in 2000 as Mr. Fortier’s chief of staff;
  
  - Appointed Gordon O’Connor, a former lobbyist for the defence industry, as Minister of Defence;
  
  - Appointed the Liberal-elected MP David Emerson, as Minister of International Trade, despite his own party’s activism against floor-crossing in the House of Commons; and
  
  - Campaigned to strengthen the role of the Ethics Commissioner but refused to be interviewed by the Commissioner’s office for his role in the Gurmant Grewal taping affair.
  
  As each day goes by, the Conservative government grows more and more unaccountable. This outrageous behaviour may just be the reason why the Prime Minister is refusing to talk to the media.
  
  Mr. Harper, you can’t hide forever.
  

Harper, Are You Really A Moron?: Part II

Harper Considering Afghanistan For First Foreign Trip
Canadian Press
Published: Friday, February 17, 2006
Source: Canada.Com

OTTAWA -- Stephen Harper is considering one of the most chaotic corners of Afghanistan as a preferred destination for his first prime ministerial foreign trip.

Perilous, sandswept Kandahar is being weighed against a more genteel option -- visits with the presidents of the U.S. and Mexico -- for Harper's first trip abroad.

Harper is expected to make all those stops eventually. He began pondering the Afghanistan option in the days after his election win.

In a post-election briefing with top military brass, Harper was urged to visit Canadian troops stationed in the southern Afghan city.

The prime minister was told that such a visit would send a strong message about his commitment to the military, and about Canada's desire to make a difference in the world.

Officials in at least two federal departments said Harper has expressed support for the idea -- without committing to it.

"Everybody's talking about it,'' said one federal official.

Another official said he found it significant that the one foreign country Harper mentioned in his Jan. 23 victory speech was Afghanistan -- not the U.S. or any other European ally.

He followed up that election-night address with a speech days later to a group of Canadian election monitors preparing to leave for Haiti.

"Canada may not be a superpower -- but we stand for higher values to which all peoples aspire,'' Harper told the audience.

"And it is important that our actions as Canadians promote these values in all corners of the Earth.''

He cited freedom, democracy, the rule of law, human rights, and compassion for the less fortunate as core values Canada can export.

Afghanistan and Haiti are at the front lines of Canada's democracy-building efforts.

The Conservative platform calls for an additional $5.3 billion in military spending over five years and 13,000 more regular forces.

In Kandahar, Canada's military presence is being increased to 2,200 this month in an effort to improve security in the longstanding Taliban stronghold.

The posting is considered far more dangerous than Canada's earlier mission to the capital Kabul.

Last month a Canadian diplomat was killed and three Edmonton-based soldiers were seriously injured when a suicide bomber attacked their convoy.

The Jan. 15 attack was one of two insurgent strikes against Canadian troops within a week. Nine Canadians have been killed in Afghanistan since early 2002.

Officials in the Prime Minister's Office said they had not heard of any plans for a trip to Afghanistan.

However, they said visits with Canada's NAFTA neighbours -- the U.S. and Mexico -- appeared to be in the cards.

Harper is expected to take his first foreign trips before Parliament returns April 3.

His first visit with Bush is being scheduled for late March. It may come during a White House stop before or after Harper meets with the U.S. president and Mexican president Vicente Fox in Mexico to review the continental relationship.

Canada's relationship with the United States soured at the executive level under former prime minister Paul Martin.

U.S. ambassador David Wilkins took the rare step of publicly rebuking Martin in the middle of the election campaign, accusing the Liberal leader of trying to score electoral points by pummelling the United States.

The Canada-U.S. relationship has bedevilled prime ministers since Confederation.

Canadian political leaders have been forced to walk a fine line between conducting good relations with the country's largest trading partner and appearing to cozy up to a country whose policy aims can run counter to Canada's.

During his first news conference after being elected, Harper tried to draw a distinct line in the relationship. Unprompted by a query, he said he would be making his own policy decisions rather than taking his cue from the U.S. ambassador.

A day earlier, Wilkins said he saw no need for the new Conservative government to enact its platform commitment to assert Canadian sovereignty in the Arctic by increasing patrols in the polar region.

© Canadian Press 2006

Harper, Are You Really A Moron?

I'm sure many have asked themselves "Is Stephen Harper a moron?" - I know that I've asked myself that question more times than I can count... not bad for him to have only been the PM for what? Three weeks? Kudos Harper, lets all give him a round of applause. Yes, you in the back, that means you need to clap as well... I don't hear any clapping! Yes, that's better. Clap clap clap... clap...

"Stephen Harper is considering one of the most chaotic corners of Afghanistan as a preferred destination for his first prime ministerial foreign trip." (Canadian Press, February 17, 2006)... is it really that smart of a move? Sure, he might want to "make a difference in the world", hell everyone does - even at Miss Universe all of those bomb-shell blondes say "I want world peace"... yea, sweetie, we all do - but that ain't gonna happen.

Harper also said "Canada may not be a superpower -- but we stand for higher values to which all peoples aspire", if that's true, then should we perhaps not act as the maid to clean up all of the messes Bush and his neo-evil buddies make? Perhaps to be better, spend alittle bit more time at "home", solve a few problems here and there in our own country... it's for example, cleaning up your little brother's messy flea-infested bedroom, when your own bedroom smells of monkey defication... wouldn't you want to clean your own room? Extreame, I know... but I'm trying to make a point here... that point being it's pretty stupid to step up another "additional 5.3 billion in military spending over five years and 13,000 more regular forces", when they could put that money somewhere like education, healthcare, maybe give a few homeless people a home?

I think I have rambled enough, if you were actually interested in this... you can go read "Harper considering Afghanistan for first foreign trip" it's an interesting article anyway...

Isn't One Enough?

The Canadian Press
Published: Friday, Februrary 17, 2006

OTTAWA -- Sooner or ater, Canadians will have to carry some form of identification other than a passport to travel outside of the country, says the new federal minister of public saftey.

The British Commons has just adopted legislation for a government-issued national ID card and Stockwell Day suggested in an interview with The Canadian Press that such a card is inevitable for Canada. "At this point, I don't know what it sould be called, to tell you the truth," Day said.
"I don't know if we'l call it that, but we want good, law-abiding people to have smooth and quick acess at all border points - not just North American, but international."

New life is being breathed into the proposal now that the United States has dropped its demand that Canadians be required to show passports to cross the border.

"We also want to be able to stop people who are a menace or a threat from getting in or getting out, so that's the overall goal," Day said.

Day said the need for identification of some sort came up again this week when he spoke on the phone with the U.S. counterpart, Homeland Security Secretary Michael Cherkoff.

"I think it's fair to stay that in both Canada and the U.S. we do not want some knd of enhanced secruity provision," he said.

"Whether that's some kind of biometric approach, an enhancement on a driver's licence - all of that needs to be explored, so we do want to see enhanced technological capacity in that area."

The idea of a national ID card was raised in the months following the Sept.11, 2001 terror attacks on the United States but proposals go back even further, as a way of replacing the abused social insurance number.

The SIN was meant only for federal government documents but evolved over the years as such uses for ID for cheque-writing. Today, there are more SINs than people as government lost control over them.

Former Liberal Immigration minister Denis Coderre has always supported a card to identify Canadians, overand above the passport.

He says a plastic card could be made to contain biometric and data information that a paper passport could not.

His proposal in 2003 - which some estimates put as high as $5 billion to implement - did not get a good reception by a Commons committee looking at the idea.

Critics at the time recalled how the Liberal gun registry started out with a price tag of only $2 million and ened up costing hundreds of millions more and said the ID card was a boondoggle-in-waiting.

Coderre said this week that it's only a matter of time before other countries follow Britain and that Canada should act to ensure control over data.

"We have to have a real debate on this... we cannot bury our head in the sand anymore," Coderre said. "Something is going on worldwide and we have to have that debate."

"Three years ago we were in the avant-garde, but right now we're trailing."

Source: National ID Card Back on the Agenda

Dude! Where's My Liberal?

Vancouver Rally Calls for Emerson to Resign
Sun, 12 Feb 2006 00:02:11 EST
CBC News

More than four hundred people attended a rally in Vancouver on Saturday to pressure Liberal-turned Tory David Emerson to resign.

It's another forum for people to vent their anger with Emerson. Organizers of two online petitions say they have gathered more than 20,000 signatures in a week.

And another rally is planned for Emerson's riding office on Sunday Afternoon.

Source

If I were in Vancouver, I would more than happily deck myself out in "Recall Emerson" pins, and wave about a brightly coloured poster-board sign. He ran as a Liberal, he promoted the Liberal platform, he even starred in a few Liberal television campaigne ads - then bam, within two weeks of the January 23rd election, he crossed over to the Conservatives as minister for international trade - needless to say, more than a few people are upset.

David Emerson has insulted the electors; people voted for a LIBERAL candidate - and that's what they should have. Supposedly, one would think you vote in a party, you get that canidate in your riding, under that party - apparently votes no longer count - or perhaps they do count... in a world were Emerson doesn't prance around thinking that he's the king of the mountain saying "Na na na na boo boo I win! Ahaha, SUCKERS!"

There was a meeting in Vancouver, regarding Emerson resigning - hundreds showed up in protest - the invitation was given out to him, could Emerson not decide what colour of tie to wear? Did he not have clean underwear to wear and had to do laundry? Whatever his excuse, what does it say to the people if their (for lack of a better word) leader (or MP) won't even show up to a simple gathering to answer a few simple questions? To me that doesn't say "I care about my riding" that says to me "I win you losers, I TRICKED YOU!" as he laughs evily while stroking one of Steven Harpers dozens of flea-infested cats.

4-walled Cell

Cat Urine & Turpentine

So, would you rather smell cat urine, or turpentine? Apparently 24 Sussex, were Steven Harper is going to take up residence, will after renovations, smell like cat urine. Really, renovate a place, make it all new and shiney - then fill it with cats! Voila, a urine smelling mansion fit for our beloved PM. I'm sure someone loves him, I certainly don't - hopefully his wife does though.

BACK TO THE POINT! Cats! Fucking felines! Granted 24 Sussex is probably in need of a few repairs, after all, look at how many people have lived in that house - however, to fill it with pests that cannot control their bladders bothers me - I'm sure it's a health code violation... I feel bad for the next person that needs to live in there... I mean... imagine this... 18 months, with a housefull of cats deficating all over it... somehow I don't think 24 Sussex will ever be the same, now that Steven Harper is in da house (yes, I did just say "da".... I felt that it needed to be there)... !

So..... everyone knows after a major renevation, one's house smells heavily of paint fumes, turpentine and all that other stuff that people use to make their homes pretty again... from past experience, I know that's a difficult stench to live with... but to through in the smell of cat urine? Litter boxes? That's one stench that I'm not about to live with - but maybe Harper has magical kitty litter that rids all smells... or at least a stock-pile of Frebreeze which is hidden from the media... something to keep that pesky cat smell at bay.

Though... isn't Harper asthmatic? While I myself am asthmatic, I know it's a good idea to remain far, far...far away from places filled with cats - their hair, "dander" and of course the aforementioned stench of kitty piss.... isn't good for one's lungs.... again... health code violation?

I think there's a stench in parliment, and it's not just Harper - it's his fuzzy urinating felines as well.

The Allure of Boots

I came across and interesting article the other day called "The Allure of Shoes: Why Do Some Need So Many", which caused me to do some great self-reflection... I'm not a "girly" girl by any means, although one could argue against that with my unhealthy facination with black eyeliner... however, I realized that I do have a little thing for shoes - I wouldn't call it a fetish, just a mere love for shoes, sandles and my weakness...BOOTS...

Anyway, after reading this article, I thought that I would personalize it - and by personalize it, I mean change every word "shoes" into "BOOTS"... thus, allowing me to further identify with the article. Be one with the article, be the article - THINK like the article... but of course subsitute "boots" for every "shoe(s)"!

So, that is what I'm going to do - I shall, for your reading pleasure, subsitute "shoe" for "boot". You'll positively love it. If you think that my spiffied up version is bullshit, then you can go read the original article - in which case "shoes" has not been subsituted for another type of footwear.
http://www.canada.com/topics/lifestyle/style/story.html?id=c36bde9d-51a8-4193-a1f7-159bc9cea7f8

So, here it is - MY interpretation of the article:

The allure of shoes: Why do some need so many?
'Boots shape the attitude of an outfit,' experts say -- and there's no guilt over sizes

Lorrayne Anthony, The Canadian Press
Published: Tuesday, January 31, 2006

TORONTO - What is it about BOOTS that can make a smart woman pay an outlandish sum for something she can only wear in good weather and when she doesn't have too far to walk?

"No matter who you are, (BOOTS) make you look and feel better," said Stuart Rice, marketing director for Browns BOOTS in Toronto, who has worn many hats in the BOOT industry for 25 years. "You can wear a pair of jeans and look like you are going shopping and I can take you and slap you in a pair of BOOTS with a high wedge with beautiful details... and all of a sudden you look dressed up and sexy.

"You put these BOOTS on and bang, you jumped up four inches in height, you lost 20 pounds, your legs look longer," he said. "You look hot. You feel hot."

Also, there is very little hassle with BOOTS; you don't have to get undressed and see your backside from all different angles, Rice said.

Rose Fuller is a sensible, yet BOOT-obsessed character played by Toni Collette in the Hllywood film In Her BOOTS, which also stars Cameron Diaz, her equally footwewar-fanatical sister, and Shirtley MacLaine as their grandmother. Rose has a theory to explain her love and need for luxurious and expensive BOOTS.

"When I feel bad, I like to treat myself. Clothes never look any good. Food just makes me fatter...BOOTS always fit."

Elizabeth Semmelhack, curator at the Bata BOOT Museum in Toronto, said that while there may be a preference for smaller feet for women, BOOT size doesn't come with the same baggage as dress sizes.

"There's no guilt associated with BOOT size, it's what God gave you," she said, adding that some people feel a thick waist is your own fault and there may be some shame when purchasing clothes in larger sizes.

Aside from fit and the transformation into a hottie, Semmelhack said BOOTS became increasingly important during the 20th century.

"Women's dress has become a lot more simplified. For example, we no longer wear hats," she said. "BOOTwear and purses, one could argue, have become incredibly important. They have to carry a lot of status information."

You can be wearing a Gap T-shirt with jeans and, depending on your BOOTS and purse, you could be a soccer mom or a Sex and the City babe, she said.

"BOOTS shape the attitude of an outfit," said Robin Keeler, fashion director at the Yorkdale mall in Toronto, adding a flat, a wedge, a stiletto, will give the same outfit a different character, "which is brilliant."

"But the wrong BOOTS just kills a look," she said.

There is no magic number when calculating the number of BOOTS each woman needs.

Keeler said it depends on budget, and advocates buying quality that will look good and be comfortable.

Brown's Rice said women can't get away with any less than five pairs per season: at least one athletic BOOT, something for the evening, something really sexy, something casual with jeans and something a little more tailored for work.

This spring's must-haves come in the shape of a wedge, with an embellished artisan look. Gone are the bubble gum casual flip-flops.

But Rice realizes there are those who can't feed an addiction wth only five hits: "I look at my wife's closet and I wish it were only five a season."
© The Edmonton Journal 2006

If you cannot already tell... I have a thing for boots... the mere thought of boots makes me excited, giggle and become profusely dehydrated after the subtle drooling... Mmmm, boots.

Cartoon Retaliation

Is there really anything such as free speech in today's world? One could argue that there isn't... in fact, I could probably put forth a lengthy argument that there is no such thing as free speech... Hell, you cannot walk down the street talking to a friend while sipping coffee sometimes without someone giving you a dirty look... God forbid someone says an explicit word. Oh fuck, I said "hell" at the beginning of that sentence... my bad...

The most recent outcries about the idea of "free speech" is seen all over the news papers and television news casts - I'm sure everyone knows about the the "cartooon incident"... in which there was a massive upheaval because of this cartoon:

You can click and enlarge it if you really want to see it...

This is now stemmed to that "contest" newspapers are having in retaliation of this cartoon; whomever drew the cartoon that started all of this was exercising 'freedom of speech' weren't they? It is only logical to think that the "other side" would do something in retaliation - which I have dubbed "Cartoon Retaliation"

I shall post one of the cartoons, though again, if you want to see the larger more... lookable version, you can click on the picture and it will magically enlarge.

So the question is... do we really have free speech?
I don't think that we do; but I'm not going to make the decision for you...

http://www.arabeuropean.org/newsimages/1139405537cartoon_2recised.jpg

Emmerson? Wasn't He A Liberal?

It appears that few are "happy" with the appointment of David Emmerson, a former Liberal MP to be the International Trade minister.

After having crossed over only two weeks after his electoral win; many are disappointed - to say the least. Many elect a canidate because they like the person in their riding, or perhaps the party... maybe even because they didn't want to vote Conservative...

Although during the last election, Belinda crossed over to the Liberal party, Emmerson did so on less than admirable levels - his consituant office was not even aware of this change until they were told by the media - a card-carrying Liberal, whom claimed that he was loyal to his party, crosses the floor and jumps into bed with Harper, before the parliment has even resumed. Smart move Emmerson.

However, dispite the simularities between deflections, "Anders denied Emerson's recruitment was a repeat of Belinda Stronach's decision to cross to the Liberals in 2005"... you're right, it wasn't - it was a more dishonest and devious move than hers. At least she gave some warning... what happened? Did Emerson wake up one morning and think "well... I think blue is more my colour?" I feel for all of those that supported Emerson and the Liberal Party - I would be pretty pissed off as well, if the MP in my riding did that.

Two faced, just "two weeks ago, Emerson was saying the Harper Conservatives were heartless"... let me guess, in a few weeks he's going to jump over to the Bloc? Perhaps NDP? Grow the famous "Layton moustache"?

Revenge By Cartoon

As many know, an Iranian paper is holding a contest for cartoons about the Holocaust, to "retaliate against the publication of images of the Prophet Muhammad" (BBC News, Tuesday February 7, 2006)... this is to test the boundaries of free speech.

There have been numerous protests about the images which are seen as insulting and racist across the Muslim world; one of which, which "showed Muhammad, whose image is banned in Islam, as a terrorist bomber" ...

story can be found at:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/4688466.stm

Steven Harper Is On Cloud 9

That Shit, Not Music

While indulging in a little bit of death-metal and hardcore - listening to a wee bit of Dark Tranquility, Opeth and Everytime I Die, my mother yells "What is that shit!?" to which I respond, "It's music Mom."... as she turned a sickly colour of green, she mutters "That's not music".

What was she talking about? It is music! She should be thankful that I'm not into the main-stream pop music, blasting Ashley Simpson and the latest American Idol. In comparison, could one not agree that listening to In Flames, Seether and a variety of "harder" music, be much easier on the ears then those "singers"? Hell, at least none of the artists that I listen to have not been caught lip-syncing! Must I bring up Ashley Simpson's little lip-sync-expose on Saturday Night Live? That's right. I didn't think so.

This got me thinking to all of the music, I'm sorry, shit that my mother listens to. Blasting Bruce Springstein and Rod Stewert... do they not assassinate my sense of hearing? Do they not cause my ears to bleed? Cannot I turn that same sickly-colour of green? I can... that music is not music, that is shit.

Funny how a parent loaths their children's music - despite the genre, and in turn, the child can hate their parent's music with a firey passion... maybe it is something built into genetics - you are never able to enjoy the parent's music, and the parent is unable to enjoy the offspring's music... must be some natural phenomenon...

Until science proves me wrong, I shall continue hating my mother's music - and she will continue hating mine, yelling from across the house "Turn that shit down"; I will just "crank up the volume" and ignore her saying "what the hell, this is music."

Batteries Not Included?

So, apparently batteries are never included with battery-required electronics - got a new phone, low and behold, it takes batteries! But do batteries come with the phone, so that you can use the newly-beloved phone? Oh, no, no, no... no... I'm thinking that the lack of batteries-included is rooted to some deep dark conspiracy... by whom and for what reason, is yet to be discovered.

Either way, it is a pain in the buttocks that batteries are no longer included. You buy a camera, batteries included, you buy some stupid child's toy, batteries are included - but once you buy something important, like a telephone, NO BATTERIES!

I very much wonder who is behind the lack of batteries. Is it that creepy pink Energizer Bunny? He keeps going and going somehow, is he hogging all of the batteries so that he can keep on going? Can the Energizer Bunny not afford to buy his own AAA batteries? Poor, battery-less bunny, why must you stash away all the batteries?

That has me now thinking about that smug look on his face - what kind of rabbit smiles like that? Let alone a pink rabbit? That rabbit is up to no good I say - and it's first evil task is to cease the idea of "batteries included"...

Or, perhaps I am just paranoid - who knows.

Does He Have Laryngitis?

Has anyone noticed how Steven Harper - (sadly) our PM designate, never speaks? Does he have laryngitis? Does the cat got his tongue? I don't know about you, but having a Prime Minister actually talk, would probably be a good thing - however, as things go, that might be his doom... who knows...

Guess he learnt to keep quiet, after the 2004 Election, he kept relatively quiet during the course of the past election, barely opened his mouth, aside from saying "Corruption!" or "Stand up for Canada!" ... however, to have the PM remain silent? Is that really the best thing? I don't think so.

"Conservative Leader Stephen Harper today refused to do a formal
question
and answer period with the media, suggesting he does not want to scare off voters by having his extreme socially conservative agenda
exposed before Monday’s general election"(Liberal website, Jan. 21, 2006)

Is it just a case, that he stopped talking, got elected and is now afraid that if he starts talking, no one will like what he has to say? Whatever the reason, perhaps it's time that his "election strategy" be discarded - eventually someone will want answers, and will not be pleased when he shrugs them off like a 4 year-old playing the "I'm not talking to you" game (I'm sure we all know that game)... maybe he's just a really shy person who doesn't talk at all, kind of shys away while everyone else buzzes about... either way, I guess we'll see what happens.

You May Ask If We're Fucked? The Answer Is Yes.

Some may ask "are we fucked?" the answer plain and simple is Yes; we are throughly "fucked" and not in the caring loving way, I'm sure many would rather have - oh no, we get to deal with that dude, seen in the photo to the left. Aren't we lucky? I'm not sure about you - it could be a photomanipulation, it might not be... either way, I think that's the only truthful thing I have ever heard a Conservative say... it's a photomanipulated photo isn't it?...

Before the election, the student's union at my school held a "Ask the Canidates" thing, all of them where there, including Colin Mayes wearing his fancy-shmancy suit; whose tie coincidently clashed with the colour of his eyes. We heard all of the typical campaign lines, in an attempt to "woo us" ... well apparently it did - as you can tell, I'm still sour about the election results... hence perhaps, the reason why I am babbling on yet for a second time about it...

The general point that I was going to make in today's blog-entry, was to explain the entertainment I got from seeing that photo, and perhaps how much I giggled like a 12-year-old-school-girl - believe me, there was giggling... That was a very craftily manufactured sign... photomanipulated into Harper's hands or not.

Hunny... Am I?

I have come to the conclusion, that my e-mail inbox consists predominantly of advertisements, or "spam" about the latest anti-depressants along with ads for gadgets and magical pills to inhance the size of one's penis. After a good few months of my e-mail being filled with nothing but the latest ads for valium, prozac, codine and viagra - I think I have gotten only a dozen or so "true" e-mails from family or friends, you know, e-mail that I would actually take a minute or two to read. But oh no, my e-mail is filled with stupid advertisements about disorders and less-than statisfactory sized male reproductive organs. Oh joy.

Normally, I wouldn't really care, just click the little delete key a million times to rid my precious mail box of those undesirable spam e-mails... however, today I thought about it... as far as I know, I don't have any psychological problems causing me to take hard-to-pronounce perscription pills (though I must admit, the word "valium" rolls off the tip of one's tongue quite nicely)... and... after a dozen advertisements saying "Are you unhappy? Can you not please your wife and/or significant other? Is it because your penis is simply too small?!"... I have come to the conclusion, that yes - I am not happy with the size of my penis; it pleases no one, and I'm ashamed to admit how small I am... everytime I read one of these e-mails, I can feel my ego plummet a few thousand-feet to somewhere below zero - all because I have an unstatisfactory-sized member... it makes me cry alittle on the inside... I hate those e-mails...

Suddenly however, it eventually dawns on me, that I in fact, do not have a penis... at least not one that I know of - I am a woman, anatomically speaking, I do not have a penis; I never have had one - so I suppose that getting such e-mails day after day, is rather pointless... what would be a relavent spam e-mail you ask? Perhaps, seeing as I am a woman, a few ads about breast enlargement - don't get me wrong, I am rather happy with my breasts, I'm comfortable with my body, but what about those less-breasted women? What are they going to do? Are advertisements for penis enlargement really going to help them in the long run? I think not...

My point being, after this long drawn-out incoherent rambling, is that spam/advertisements filling my inbox, do less than amuse me... they quite often make me mummble to myself "what the hell? why am i getting this?! I'm not a man!"... I'm sure somewhere, some man has gotten depressed after reading all of those enlargement ads, and ordered a year's supply of valium, prozac and a party-mix of antidepressants... poor, poor man...

Conservative Days Are Numbered

It's been a good week since the Canadian Federal Election - needless to say I wasn't the most pleased person in this country, like many anti-conservatives, I felt the need to dress in black and crawl into a hole waiting to die while listening to some Emo music. I'm sorry, I wouldn't wear black, I already wear that colour constantly. Oh shucks...

My riding was predicted to be Liberal, or at least NOT CONSERVATIVE. Colin Mayes, aside from having a few years of being mayor of my tiny town, has had no federal experience whatsoever - not even provincial experience, may I add. No one talked about voting Conservative - when asked why people to vote for him, his only reason was "Because, I've been the mayor of Salmon Arm for ___ years" ... if that were reason enough, then I'm over-qualified for the job, I'm an 18-yr old who watches the news and watches more than enough CPAC...

Apparently other's shared my non-supporting views of the Conservative party, some hooligan armed with red spray paint, defaced EVERY, and I mean EVERY Conservative party sign going up the highway - and apparently all the way to Vernon as well. I must add, it was a pretty shade of red, no other colour could have better been used to write: I <3>I was surprised enough that Harper "won"... what surprised me more, is that Mayes won the riding here... people were complaining about the Liberals and all the corruption... did no one take into account that Mayes is currently being SUED?! That's a smart move... elect some dude that's being sued and has not the foggiest idea of how to handle federal politics - smart move genius, let me clap for you - thankfully, I don't think, that the Conservatives will stay in parliment long - don't get too comfy in those funky green chairs labelled whatever name that side of the parlimentry argument room, or as I like to call it the side of the room labeled "HAHA WE WON!! SUCKERS!" side of the room.

If you think that I'm just fabricating all of this, then why don't you check out this nifty website article that I found? Says it right there about Mayes getting his black business pants sued off him. Oh... how the days are numbered. Just a matter of days/weeks/months for the Liberals to get their posse armed with koosh-balls and nerf-dart gun toys to find a new leader... I give the Conservatives a few months... maybe 18?

www.chbc.com/index.php?name=News&file=article&sid=12120

Mommy! I'm Just Like Hitler!

Has anyone else realized how Hitler-like the US president, George Bush is? Goes around killing thousands of innocent people for no reason - just as Hitler did, oh, I'm sorry - he was "seeking weapons of mass destruction" or... what it to "over-throw Saddam"? So many made up excuses, one is never sure which one to use on any given day. I'm sure that Bush is just misunderstood - just like I'm sure everyone misunderstood Hitler for murdering hundreds of thousands of people. How could the United States have someone in power like Hitler? Aren't they under a democratic dictatorship? I mean... "democracy". I guess that's one of the "perks" of being considered one of the "super-powers" though, the right to do whatever you want, at whatever expense for the sole reason of "I wanna do this, and I'm gonna!" ... perhaps Bush played too many rounds of that Risk boardgame while he grew up... maybe listened to a bit too much of that infernal rock 'n roll music as well...

I'm sure he has perfectly good reasons for doing all of the things that he is - but I just can't see it... maybe it was to "combat terrorism", perhaps it was listening to too much rock 'n roll music, perhaps he's just a moron, or perhaps it was too many rounds of Risk as a child. Whatever the reason, I'm tired of listening to them.

political giddyness

Paul Martin gave a speech in Winnipeg on January 3rd, 2006... it is a speech basically addressing the issues of the campaign; other days I would just say "meh, another political speech", as we all know, typically speeches are rather boring, even after bits and pieces of humor are slipped in... however, today is another story... today, in the PM's speech, he opened with:

With three weeks to go until election day, I think it’s fair to say it is only now that most Canadians will be giving this campaign their full attention. During the next number of days, I’ll be presenting elements of our election platform. But today, I want to do something a little different. I want to tell you about an email I received. “I’m voting for the first time,” a young woman wrote. “Tell me why I should vote for you.”

A few weeks ago, the PM's speechwriter asked on the offical Liberal website, for people to send in whatever question they wanted, and he (the speechwriter) would ask Paul Martin - and in turn, the PM would anwer the question. I asked, word for word, what Paul Martin said in those quotation marks. I said to him "I'm voting for the first time, tell me why I should vote for you." I am the "young woman"... I realize that he has probably gotten a billion questions like this, however what are the chances that Paul Martin would say word for word, what an impressionable 18-year-old girl said? I don't think it's a coincidence really, I have a feeling that he read my e-mail, as he'd read dozens before... what got me, is that Paul Martin refers back to the 'young woman' a few times - in the middle and at the end of his speech...

I answered her. But since then, I’ve found myself reflecting on that email – because what she’s asking is really the question that Canadians are asking across our country. They are looking at the parties and the leaders. They are looking to vote for someone, and for something. They are looking to vote for a vision of Canada that is faithful to their values and the values on which this country was forged.

Today, I want to set the stage for the second half of the campaign by talking about those values – by giving my view of what’s at stake in this election and what it means for Canada. Because therein lies the answer to that young woman’s question – it lies in the values and the beliefs of those who seek to be prime minister.

I cannot help but feel rather giddy - he answered my question; the Prime Minister of Canada not only read my e-mail and answered it... but to answer it in a nation-wide speech is amazing. All of my questions regarding this election have been answered - all it took was a genuine response by a politician.I could be wrong, it may be all coincidence, but I find it just a bit ironic, that what I asked, was answered/mentioned in such a speech... by the PM... needless to say, I am quite giddy, all questions answered in a well-thought out national speech.